The Father issue..

Dearest readers and Atiqah, thanks so very much for staying with me in this journey of my life. Not the easiest part chosen, whether its the right one or not I'm not too sure sometimes. But I know it will all come down to something, an experience. Which is something that no money can buy once it's passed.

Anyway, my father's death anniversary just passed some few days ago. We were all suppose to go for Mass (service) in the evening. However, mum who suggested and agreed on going to church, somehow forgot until I had to call her some half an hour before the service. Anyway, sis, granma and I shot off by cab (which has a miscommunication problem as to me taking the cab instead of driving). We arrive some half way through the Mass. I didn't participate, sis sat outside, and granma went all the way infront. Mum arrived 10 minutes after the service was over. I was pissed off, red hot mad throughout the whole thing.

Anyway, on the way home, mum started questioning the miscomunications with my sis telling me off. That was the trigger, it sent me all out in every direction. Mum scolded saying that Papa wouldn't want us arguing. With that, she got one headshocking shot when I shouted "my father is DEAD!!!'. And that was it, a whole big argument started again, with a pause when I got chased out of the car to the road side. They didn;t go off of course, if they did, I wouldn;t go back home. Anyway, we continued home after that, and all retired to our respective rooms in boiling silent anger. The bf, he came over and manage to cool me down. The fight continued however, at about 2am when a door slammed shut. And who was the one to get it first? Me of course. Argued, got my usual x>10 slaps on the head and face. Argued argued argued... But in the end, it was actually my father I was angry at, but I released onto everybody else. All those times that my father forgot my birthday, never wished me, uncaring attitude from my perspective, everything was released in 1 sentence, ' I don't know my Father'. Purpose of writing the Letter achieved through alternative ways. Now question is, what to do with it?

So we wait for bro. G to help out. Hopefully soon. Stay tuned.
Lover Boi